第147章 妙手回春刘神医(1 / 1)
勿扰封神
风圣大鹏
1096 字
2023-09-25
刘长生惊讶,错愕道:“什么叫放过,我是想帮他啊!”他对一旁的安罡安慰道:“不要害怕,我刚刚只是误伤,其实心里也很内疚。”安罡哭唧唧道:“你把我的鲲鲲还给我。”刘长生神色从容,自信道:“其实你想恢复过来很简单,只要用天竺神油,配合肾宝,四十九天就能重振男人雄风。”安罡现在是病急乱投医,急忙问道:“什么是天竺神油、肾宝?”刘长生神秘一笑,取出请封神大仙紧急炼制的壮羊药。这是一个金色的瓶子,看起来奢华而尊贵,上面还写着一行小字‘找回自信,做真男人’。刘长生介绍道:“这就是传说中的‘天竺神油’,只要抹七七四十九天,就可以让你重新焕发男人的活力。”他又取出一个玉瓶,摆出一副推销的口吻,“搭配肾宝,效果更好!”“白天吃肾宝,提神抗疲劳,把肾透支的补起来。”“晚上抹神油,坚挺如神枪,一夜一次,一次天亮!”安罡眼睛一亮,仿佛看了生命的希望,非常识趣道:“多少灵石?”刘长生笑道:“今天特惠,不要九九八,也不要九十八,只要九千九百八,天竺神油带回家。现在下单,再添八千八百八十八,更能获得肾宝一瓶!”安罡毫不迟疑,道:“给我来一瓶!”说着,就要掏藏物袋。不过就在手摸到灵石的时候,他又警惕问道:“你不会骗我吧,这天竺神油、肾宝,真的有用?”刘长生笑,“当着这么多人,我能骗你?要是四十九天之后没有效果,你只管来第六峰找我退款。”安罡看了眼四周,相信了刘长生的话。众目睽睽之下,他的确没理由骗自己。况且,自己现在也别无选择,只能死马当成活马医。“等一等。”就在安罡冲动消费,准备替自己下半生的幸福努力时,安北突然开口,对刘长生道:“多谢你替安罡着想,不过断了烦恼根也好,正好能让他安心修炼。”安罡整个人都愣住,不可思议的看着安北,叫道:“爹,你说什么?”安北沉着脸。如果是其他人卖天竺神油、肾宝,他肯定不会阻止,但刘长生这货一肚子坏水,肯定没憋好屁。他的东西不能买。刘长生皱眉,安北这老东西有点坏啊,为了不让我赚钱,儿子的幸福都不管了?他故意叹了口气,把神油、肾宝都收起来,对安罡道:“既然安峰主都这么说了,我也爱莫能助,安兄弟……不,安姐姐,你自己报仇。”我艹!刘长生的称呼,杀伤力实在太大了,让安罡直接破防。神特么姐姐?老子是正经纯爷们啊!想到自己已经不是真男人,日后会面临的白眼和嘲笑,讽刺和挖苦,还有无数人茶余饭后,拿自己当谈资,他就承受不住。安罡狠狠一咬牙,道:“别管他,是我买,又不是他买,快把肾宝和神油都给我!”他毫不迟疑取出灵石,迫不及待的递给刘长生。安北见状大怒,喝道:“住手,不许买!”事关性福生活,安罡竟罕见的强硬起来,叫道:“你和我已经断绝关系了,凭什么管我,你又不是我爹。”安北被气得快吐血。尼X。自己怎么生了这么个孽种?安罡急忙催促,道:“快,快给我,我已经忍不住了。”刘长生同情的看了安北一眼,连忙撇清关系,强调道:“跟我没关系,是他自己说的。”安北牙咬得咯嘣直响,冷冷看了刘长生一眼,对沈穆道:“沈长老,安某还有事要处理,就不奉陪了,告辞!”沈穆心中无奈。刘长生可真是个惹祸精,这次算是把安北得罪死了。再看刘长生,竟然还跟没事人一样,在热情的给安罡推销,讲解怎么使用天竺神油、肾宝。安罡听得连连点头,满脸认真,一个字都不敢错过。沈穆根本没眼看。安罡这货根本不长记性啊,活该被刘长生玩成这样。也不怪安北被气得半死。
>如果换成自己,只怕已经上去把安罡掐死了。安罡还在不断点头,对刘长生问道:“刘哥,这一瓶神油可以用多久?”刘长生道:“一瓶用三天,你用完之后,来第六峰找我,咱们都是老熟人,我给你优惠。”“啊?肾宝呢?一瓶能吃几天?”安罡脸色变了变,急忙询问。刘长生耐心道:“肾宝和神油是套餐,都是三天一疗程。”安罡眼前一黑,觉得自己受到了欺骗。尼X!刘长生这逼果然是个奸商,一万八千八,竟然只能用三天?这么算下来,四十九天岂不是要三十多万!安罡心里直呼我艹。他毫不犹豫道:“我考虑了一下,其实现在这样也挺好的,没了烦恼根,生活更轻松,让我可以心无杂念,更好的修行,我不买了,你把灵石退给我。”刘长生脸色一沉,不高兴道:“不孝有三,无后为大,你这个决定,多少有些违背祖宗!因为一点灵石,你就要放弃未来的幸福生活吗?”他说话时,顺手从封神古界,摸出一本杂志。封面上,就是一个大长腿的性感嫩模。知道安罡是什么货色之后,刘长生早就有准备,根据自己记忆中的画面,让封神大仙创造出这一本宅男杀器!相比较普通的杂志,这本更是青出于蓝,只要注入法力,里面的人就会动起来,发出不同的声音,做出不同的动作,并且让你身临其境,比vr还真实。刘长生微微一笑,注入法力。这‘杂志’封面上的人,就变得模糊起来。下一刻。她竟直接走下来,来到安罡面前,嘴里喊着‘亚麻跌’、‘斯国一’、‘哒咩’等奇奇怪怪,让人听不懂的话。当然。这一切,只有刘长生和安罡能看到。安罡刚刚被踢废鲲鲲,心理还没完成转变,看到这些,依旧和普通男人一样有冲动。面对大长腿嫩模的挑逗,当即就把持不住了,眼神都变得迷离。刘长生恰到好处的中止画面。安罡正沉迷于温柔乡,见小姐姐突然消失,心里十分难受,七上八下的。而这时。刘长生把杂志翻了一页,露出一个嘿丝长腿美女。安罡彻底呆滞,心里直呼我艹,口水都快流出来了。他哪见过这个啊!刘长生心中暗笑,对安罡低语道:“生活不止有修行,还有美女和远方,你难道真的想放弃这一切,从此兄弟变姐妹?”
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